“Sometimes you make up your mind about something without knowing why, and your decision persists by the power of inertia…”

by kaleidegirl

Seems it doesn’t take much time or lack of saying things to cause the need for catching people up. Thank you “too much technology”.  For every hour I spend on my laptop I find I am equally annoyed at my own and others complete reliance on it for social interaction. I’ve been hermitting due to over abundance of insanity the last few months but I like to window shop and with so much cold and no freedom, the internet has become my daily mall replacement so to speak. Being a very social creature, the hermit thing was new to me and my need for it is quickly waning. I suppose that means I will be trying to talk to and see people again. (not an easy thing without a car which irks me to no end)

Many people have been asking about Kamots, the lovely white german sheperd we had. I think especially with the addition of our puppy Siobhan. I will do my best to explain why we no longer have him. The biggest thing was that he was not socialized at all as far as people go. This was to the point of severe aggression that made us afraid to have him off leash while Mary or anyone else was here.  He was difficult to walk and very strong so my hands and wrists were hurting from trying to hold him while he tried to pull me quickly down the walk. We never knew when he needed to actually go out because he gave no clear sign and always got excited when we asked so we were taking him out something like a dozen times a day trying to figure what the deal was. Basically he usually just wanted to go out and be out. We got a tie out for the back yard but had to wait for it to be secure due to him being so strong. When we finally could give him free out time he would often times have to be brought in because he was barking like crazy at the dog next door. Simon learned to tolerate him and just ignored him but Bellatrix was terrified and would try to hide and he would aggressively terrorize her. We had been doing research on german sheperds for months, maybe longer and then started doing more and trying things to remedy these issues to no avail. We were very concerned that he would eventually bite someone and possibly be put down. So we took him to a no-kill shelter that does more than take dogs in, they work with them to make them more adoptable. I checked the site regularly and he was adopted a couple weeks ago. It was the best thing for all involved.

Then I thought we were going back to our “wait til spring” plan to try again (if at all, we were quite stressed and upset over our failure and foolishness). Then I noticed Chris “puppy shopping”. At first I was annoyed because this is the worst time of year to potty train a puppy and such. Finally I got tired of his shopping and knew he was going to keep doing it for hours a day and one day he was particularly taken by a couple pups at CAHS. I made the call and let him know they had some of the ones he really liked and we had time if he wanted to go. Basically he wanted a puppy and wanted one now. So we went, we looked, we met Siobhan (Cha Cha at the time) and she was visibly terrified but adorable and we all just took to her so she came home with us. I think it took me a day or two before I realized I shouldn’t have been so annoyed. I am the queen of “I must do/get/go NOW NOW!” when I decide on something and he was just doing the same thing.

Anyway, Siobhan is a boxer/lab retriever mix. She is still a bit skittish and afraid of us but she loves Simon and they play together like best friends. She even cries when he gets bored and goes off to do cat things. Bellatrix is not fond but Siobhan doesn’t get in her face too much and Bellatrix has stopped hiding. Despite her fear of us she is taking to potty training very well. She loves cuddling in our laps on the couch or laying at my feet with Simon. She seems to have a great personality under that lingering skittishness. We plan to be as diligent as possible in making sure she is properly trained, socialized, healthy and very happy we hope.

I don’t think anything else of importance is going on. I’m back to trying to get my figure back, with a vengeance. I really need to, I refuse to buy new clothes. I need to get back into all the cute stuff I bought last time I lost weight. I really don’t fit into a lot of my clothes and that just won’t do.

I am also going for a hearing test tomorrow and I won’t be a bit surprised if they say I need a hearing aid. No, I am not going to be all self conscious about wearing one. My hearing loss is most likely due to all the fun I’ve had at concerts and such and that is nothing to be ashamed of. I’m sure Chris is just as tired of repeating himself as I am with saying “What?” all the time.

Oh, I’m still crazy. My recent apathy (something else new to me) has been an issue when my mood shifts enough for me to care. I randomly came across a “How are you handling your bipolar?” quiz and it said I’m not doing so well. Oddly that result surprised me which is another sign that it was prob right.

I don’t know where to go from here…I’m in a state of apathetic stagnation. Well depending on my mood. So I’m sure in about 10-30 minutes I may be busy dying my hair and painting my nails, or trying to walk Siobhan.