on march 11th, the day before my 39th birthday i bleached my hair and dyed it red. i’ve always liked red hair but awhile back i found out my husband didn’t like it, not any of the natural shades at least. he was ok with the manic panic red. then suddenly in the store he points out the red section of some new brands of dye. so i asked about it and he said he didn’t mind it.
(this is my life with bipolar)
i pretty much immediately took out my dreads that had only been put in about a week before. (i started this in my car while driving then did most of it while waiting at SOS to renew my registration) i got bleach, twice because i ran out. (i guess my hair is pretty thick) i didn’t need to bleach any lighter after those two rounds and i dyed my hair red. the next day i got a fresh haircut. i said something about how i had wanted to shave the side i always like to keep much shorter than the other but my husband said he wouldn’t like that and she suggested shaving just a little underneath. i said go for it. next day i had to go back because the short side was just not blended the way i wanted, while there i had them shave the shaved part down even shorter and i liked it much better that way. almost a couple weeks later i decided to try again to get it closer to the manic panic red he likes because he mentioned that the current color was fading. i stopped at Sally’s and got some bleach and this new permanent red red. i wanted to do this in the first place but their credit card machine was down so i used what i could find at the pharmacy. well i ended up with very coppery hair, basically orange. i knew he would hate it and actually wanted to hide. we went to the store and he picked out a ruby red he liked and i figured it would go over the orange just fine. it didn’t really. it wasn’t quite so brassy and i liked the color.
so then Saturday night we are having a few drinks and i show him the shaved part that i had been waiting for him to notice on his own. he said he had already seen it. i was surprised he didn’t say anything because he had already said he wouldn’t like the side being shaved. he claims he NEVER said any such thing. he really did but i lately he has been less opposed to things i want to do with m hair and such. anyway. the next day, yesterday, before i started getting around to go see the in-laws for easter i shaved the side of my head. i got to a point where i needed help and went over to his parents house just a few blocks away and she finished it for me. my daughter showed up after i was showered and such and picked me up and she was not pleased. she accused me of going through a mid-life crisis. i laughed and said my whole life was a crisis.
luckily none of the family had anything negative to say. my father in law even said he liked it. my sister in law said she would do something like that and thought it was pretty cool. this was nice because i was sure i was walking into an emotional war zone of criticism.
so i went from this the first week of march
to this by the last week of march
once what is left of my hair is healthier and will take dye better i plan to get the ruby red again to cover this still kind of orangy red.
so yeah. this is the kind of thing that happens during a manic phase. when i decide to change my hair or something my brain is very NOW NOW NOW and i’m a bunged up mess until i get it done.
i’m not keeping it this way. i like it but i have been working on growing my hair out. i miss my long black waves. i will have to go through a long awkward hair stage but once it grows back enough that i can dye it to match the rest when i touch up my roots it won’t look so bad while growing out and once it does i will have a very asymmetrical cut going on and that is something i was working on too.
so yeah, not a “midlife crisis” just part of being me and being bipolar.